For all those not quite feeling the love this Valentine’s Day, The Resident picks out 13 ways to celebrate the day solo or with friends…
1 Anti-Valentine’s Party at Bounce, Farringdon
Bounce is hosting a night of strictly Anti-Valentine’s fun. They’re pairing up with the friendship app Bumble to bring you a night filled with UV ping pong, face paint, music from DJ Shredded Pete, smashing apart heart-shaped piñatas, drinking strong cocktails, and experiencing true love by way of pepperoni pizza. If you happen to find a compatible match their famous love police will be taking mugshots of ‘romance rebels’. 6pm-late. Tickets £5.
121 Holborn, Farringdon EC1N 2TD; bouncepingpong.com
2 Lady Chastity’s Reserve Escape Room, various locations
Bring your friends on an adventure to of hilarious clue solving as you escape the world you know and enter rooms of ludicrously twisted mysteries solve Lady Chastity’s sordid secrets in time to win her fabled bottle of aphrodisiac wine. This escape room is not for the faint of heart, offering an immersive adventure which will have you delving into secret rooms hidden in the depths of England’s finest drinking establishments. If you want to get your pulse racing in a different way this Valentine’s day, this is the event for you. Taking place at The Four Thieves in Battersea, The People’s Park Tavern in Victoria Park, The Depot in Islington and The Hope in Farringdon. Tickets £20.
3 The Bleeding Heart Ball, The Vaults
Gypsy Disco & Shotgun Carousel, two of London’s leading immersive event extraordinaries, have joined forces once again to produce one giant of a party full of passion, enchantment, and risk! Having gone underground, they return with a new Anti-Valentine’s event, The Bleeding Heart Ball. You can expect to hear the wildest gypsy folk and brass-heavy bands, gender-bending cabaret, awe-inspiring interactive theatre performances and jaw-dropping circus acts! 10:30pm-2:30am. Tickets £18.50.
Leake Street, Waterloo SE1 7AD; vaultfestival.com
4 Three Girls Cook…for all the Single Ladies at Brother Marcus
Following on from the success of their sell-out junk food supper club in 2017, Three Girls Cook is back at Brother Marcus for round-two. The trio of MasterChef 2017 finalists, Alison, Giovanna, and Lorna are hosting a Valentine’s Day special especially for all those who prefer fries over guys. Expect delicious dishes, sassy tunes and some strong cocktails from the Brother Marcus boys. 7:30pm -10:30pm. Tickets £42.
9 Chestnut Grove, Balham SW12 8JA; designmynight.com
5 Springsteen is For Lovers: A Valentine’s Bash at The Grand, Clapham
She Street Band, the all-girl Bruce Springsteen cover band, is returning to London this February. Following their sold-out debut gig at The Moth Club last April, the She Street Band is returning to their hometown and cooking up something special, a Valentines themed blow out that would make Springsteen proud. You can expect all the classic hits such as Born To Run, Thunder Road and Dancing in the Dark with a female twist. Not only will She Street Band be performing live, but DJ’s from Hungry Heart will be keeping the 80s themed party going. 7pm-late. Tickets are £12.50.
21-25 St John’s Hill, Clapham Junction SW11 1TT; shestreetband.com
6 Veuve Clicquot Smashes Hearts Dinner at Granary Square Brasserie, King’s Cross
Veuve Clicquot, the French Champagne house, is taking over Granary Square Brasserie in King’s Cross on Wednesday 14th and Thursday 15th February 2018 for a series of Anti Valentine’s dinners. Music will be provided by DJ Jez Pereira. On both nights, a giant Veuve Clicquot Piñata heart will be hanging from the ceiling inviting you to smash it for the chance to win prizes, including a magnum of Veuve Clicquot Rosé. Quote ‘Soulmates’ when booking a table of three or more and you will receive a complimentary glass of Veuve Clicquot Rosé on arrival.
1-6, Granary Building, Granary Square, King’s Cross N1C 4AA; granarysquarebrasserie.com
7 Whistle Punks Axe Throwing, Vauxhall
Axe throwing with Whistle Punks is the perfect Valentine’s Day antidote. Broken hearts especially need to apply. What could be more cathartic than flinging an axe at a target? Especially if you hit the bullseye. Sure, it sounds dangerous, but these guys have filled out their health and safety forms. Experienced throwing coaches will soon have you throwing like a pro, and once you’ve got the hang of it you and your group will be entered into a Game of Thrones-esque tournament until the king or queen of axes is crowned. Tickets from £22.
Arch 25, Handel Business Centre, 73 Bondway, Vauxhall SW8 1SQ; whistlepunks.com
8 F**k Tinder London at The Prince of Wales, Brixton
The smashing hit returns to London for a Valentines Day special, F**k Tinder is speed dating but with a twist. This comedy show is designed to get single people together to have a good night out, chat with interesting people and do a lot of laughing. This is the event for you if you want to meet new people and love a good bit of comedy. 8pm-11pm. Tickets £20.
467-469 Brixton Road, Brixton SW9 8HH; pow-london.com
9 Silent Sounds Boat Party, Tower Millennium Pier
Change up your party plans with the Silent Sounds Boat Party. Hop aboard The Dutch Master, a two-storey party boat, for a night of drinking and dancing with a difference as you float by iconic London landmarks on the Thames while choosing the soundtrack to your night at a silent disco. If you are feeling bored of the same old party scene this might be the thing to spice up your Valentines weekend. 7:45pm-11:30pm. Tickets £25.
The Dutch Master, Tower Millennium Pier EC3N 4AB; silentsoundslondon.com
10 Playboy Ladies Night at The Playboy Club, Mayfair
Following on from last year’s success, it is once again girls night at The Playboy Club in London! Make February 14 Galentine’s Day at their glamorous Tale Bar where you can shed your stress and spoil yourself with mani-pedis, cocktails, and music. Have a night full of pampering and pleasure surrounded by all your favourite girlfriends. 6pm-late. Tickets £10.
14 Old Park Lane, Mayfair W1K 1ND; playboyclublondon.com
11 Faulty Towers Dining Experience at East Dulwich Tavern
This globetrotting show is truly legendary, selling out in places like Edinburgh Fringe. In this fully immersive experience, you become diners in the infamous ‘Faulty’ restaurant, served a 3-course meal. Expect lashings of laughter, bowls full of spontaneity and as much audience participation as you want. And with 70% of the show improvised, no two performances are ever the same. This is certainly a way to enjoy an ant – valentines day dinner. 7pm–10pm. Tickets £54.
1 Lordship Lane, East Dulwich SE22 8EW; eastdulwichtavern.com
12 Séance at The London Dungeon
Get ready to make contact with the spirit world at The London Dungeon. You join the sinister Victorian medium Agnes Guppy as she attempts to contact the afterlife in this spine-tingling experience. If you are brave enough to visit this February, you can expect a hair-raising experience. Will you be able to hold your nerve and leave with your soul intact? Tickets from £21.
County Hall, Westminster Bridge Road SE1 7PB; thedungeons.com
13 Nature Morte at Guildhall Art Gallery, the City
Inspired by the core themes in Nature Morte, this Late event promises an enjoyable night of music, art, drawing, and cocktails. Watch a Victorian entertainment show, enjoy trying out still life drawing, flower pressing or tote bag making and learn about ‘ethical’ taxidermy with Jazmine Miles-Long. DJ Museum of Vinyl’s life and death-inspired playlist will provide the soundtrack to the evening. 7pm-10pm. Tickets £16.
Guildhall Yard, London EC2V 5AE; cityoflondon.gov.uk